白居易诗
Poems of Bai Juyi
Index
酬元九对新栽竹竿有怀见寄
As the Bamboo Reminds Me of You, I Remember Where My Heart Lived
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昔我十年前 与君始相识 曾将秋竹竿 比君孤且直 |
Long time, maybe ten years ago, We got to know each other. I just saw a stand of autumn's bamboo, Lonely and straight, and thought of you. |
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中心一以合 外事纷无极 共保秋竹心 风霜侵不得 |
In our hearts, we were as one, even though The world outside was a complete mess. Together we guarded autumn's bamboo heart and, When hardships came, they couldn't have their way. |
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始嫌梧桐树 秋至先改色 不爱杨柳枝 春来软无力 |
I began disliking the phoenix trees when Autumn came and your expression began to change. I couldn't love the poplar and willow blossoms when Spring came and your softness was gone. |
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怜君别我后 见竹长相忆 常欲在眼前 故栽庭户侧 |
I sympathized with you, after you left me, Every time the bamboo brought you back to me. And often, I have wished you were here, as I stood, Leaning on the courtyard door, memories filling my head. |
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分首今何处 君南我在北 吟我赠君诗 对之心恻恻 |
Mostly, I wonder where you are now -- Somewhere South, with me in the North. I even hear myself moan a little as I write this, Which suits the way I feel now -- very sad. |
-- 白居易
废话
This poem was written around 810. Bai Juyi is 38. Married. His mother is still alive. He hasn't gotten into any trouble yet. And he is missing someone. The sources I have say that he is missing his friend Yuan Zhen.
I'm not happy about this. Perhaps because this translation turned out so well, at least to my mind, that I identify with the feelings it aroused in me. And I feel he should be missing a woman, if he feels this way. Yuan Zhen is 元稹. The Yuan in the title is Yuan Jiu 元九 or Yuan "Nine." "Nine" is not a woman's name. Unless this is Nine Silver Coins and she went by her price tag in the place where Bai Juyi paid for her services. My sources are no help with Yuan Nine. And Bai Juyi, we know, viewed women in a fairly enlightened way.
So we're stuck with him missing Yuan Zhen. Who I thought was nearby in Ningbo. But maybe he's been posted south by now. One things strikes me as possible to account for Bai Juyi's sadness. He and Yuan Zhen used to be idealistic together. In eleven years, Yuan Zhen will be stripped of his scholar's position but still hanging around with the worst Tang Emperor I can name at this point. So maybe Yuan Zhen has been changing a bit, each time the two men met since Bai Juyi moved back to Chang'an. The sadness has been growing. And now, with Yuan Zhen at a distance, these changes obscure Bai Juyi's happy idealistic memories.
Kind of sad. If he were missing a woman, it would be a happier kind of sadness. Unless he's gay. Then this would be that kind of sadness. It is the Late Tang, after all. I'm not making any claims one way or the other here. I'm just ruminating on sadness, its varieties, and how we don't get to pick which kind of sadness comes to sit on our heart.
[Later] Silly me. Siblings are informally numbered. Yuan Zhen's older brother was Yuan Ba (Eight). So Yuan Zhen is Yuan Nine.