Middle of Somewhere
By
R. Earle Harris All rights reserved (c) 2015 (r dot earle dot harris at gmx dot com)
FADE IN:
INT. KITCHEN - DAY
Steve Forbert's Something's Got A Hold On Me begins. KARL,
mid-thirties, sips coffee, and looks out the kitchen window he stands
beside.
EXT. DRIVEWAY - DAY
Wrecked red Ford pickup on one side of driveway. Looks bad enough
someone could have died in it. Still barely drivable.
INT. KITCHEN - DAY
Karl shakes his head.
KARL
Karl sips, looks at other half of driveway.
EXT. DRIVEWAY - DAY
Even older blue Ford LTD. Blue has to be inferred from what
isn't ruined of the paint job.
INT. KITCHEN - DAY
Karl shakes his head.
KARL
STEPHANIE, Karl's teenage daughter, enters kitchen, kisses him on
cheek, looks out window.
EXT. DRIVEWAY - DAY
Grim wrecked pickup.
INT. KITCHEN - DAY
Karl waits for daughter to speak.
STEPHANIE
KARL
Promised what, Stephanie?
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STEPHANIE
Don't do that. You promised to lose
that truck.
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KARL
He turns from the window.
KARL (CONT'D)
STEPHANIE
Don't change the subject.
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They sit down to bowls of Lucky Charms.
KARL
Okay. I'm sorry. But that was our good
truck. I guess I'll get the LTD
repainted first.
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STEPHANIE
So it isn't so disreputable?
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KARL
STEPHANIE
KARL
STEPHANIE
And when you paint the rust bucket--
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KARL
STEPHANIE
--you'll lose the truck. Right?
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KARL
Well. I don't ... Okay. Right.
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EXT. TOWN - DAY
Schoolday morning in middle-of-nowhere Wyoming town.
EXT. SCHOOL - DAY
LTD pulls up, cross traffic, in front of school.
EXT. LTD - DAY
Karl waits while Stephanie gets out.
STEPHANIE
Here comes the principal, Dad. See you.
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KARL
PRINCIPAL, stiff unpleasant woman, approaches.
PRINCIPAL
You can't park like that! You're facing
the wrong way.
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KARL
PRINCIPAL
And your daughter. She's smoking!
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KARL
PRINCIPAL
It's illegal. She's underage.
Someone's buying her cigarettes.
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KARL
No they're not. She's stealing
mine. But I've got to go. Got to paint
my car.
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PRINCIPAL
I remember you, Robert. You've always
had these rusted out old cars. And
girls. You've always had girls in the
backseat. You're the one got that
Martin girl pregnant, would have been
fifteen, twenty-some years ago. She was
a lovely girl -- until you got hold of
her. She's still a single mother, no
one to help her with that child all
these years. And--
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KARL
Ma'am. My name is Karl. I got here
three years ago and the only woman I
ever got pregnant was my wife. My
daughter smokes because she's trying to
figure out how to grow up. And I can't
help her there because I haven't grown
up yet myself. Now if you'll let go of
my window, I've got to paint my car.
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She frowns at the rust bucket.
PRINCIPAL
EXT. KEN'S - DAY
Old gas station. Grimy. Sign: Jesus is Lord - Wrecking and Repair.
EXT. KEN'S - DAY
Karl pulls up in front. KEN, long-hair, balding,
unshaven, waves. Small sign behind him says: Cars
Wrecked and Repaired.
EXT. KEN'S - DAY
Karl climbs out.
KEN
Sorry, Karl. I'm booked solid.
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EXT. KEN'S DRIVE - DAY
There are maybe three cars waiting to be worked on.
EXT. KEN'S - DAY
Karl shakes his head.
KARL
Morning, Ken. You'd better hope I'm bringing
you business. Yours never looked sorrier.
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KEN
No way. I'm right straight out. Never busier.
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KARL
You're down to skin and bones.
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Ken looks down at himself.
KEN
I can afford groceries. So, you bringing
me some business?
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KARL
KEN
You trying to starve me? What am I
supposed to do for a living in this town?
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KARL
You'll be okay. You've never been busier.
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KEN
Hey. I've got three cars here. And two
of them are mine. How 'bout a rebuild?
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KARL
KEN
Motor? Transmission? Self-esteem? How
'bout it?
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KARL
KEN
KARL
EXT. KEN'S - DAY
Rear of garage. Weeds. Wrecked cars. Two lawn chairs with a warped
and weathered coffee table. Ken pours fancy coffee.
KEN
I could'a made you a latte.
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KARL
They sit.
KEN
So what wisdom were you hoping to
squeeze from this turnip today?
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KARL
KEN
It should be about your truck.
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KARL
You leave my truck out of this.
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KEN
Where you're concerned, my truck advice
is better than my car advice.
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KARL
Everyone thinks they have good truck
advice for me. Starts up first thing
every morning.
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KEN
You should listen to your daughter.
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KARL
Can I ask you my car question?
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KEN
I don't know. Sure. Shoot.
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KARL
I've got to paint my car.
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KEN
And you need a color choice?
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KARL
KEN
Was blue. It's more or less mottled
now. Brownish, kind of sewage-ie.
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KARL
It's a mottled blue. But I'm going to
make it solid blue again. A solid blue.
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KEN
KARL
KEN
That's because you need--
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KARL
Don't mention my truck. Just let me get
my question out. Then we can talk about
something else while we finish our expressos.
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KEN
KARL
Espressos. Milli regretti.
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KEN
Ah. Bene, bene. Tutti bene. And your
question, my son?
|
KARL
You know anyone in town I can trust to
paint my car?
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KEN
Trust ... to paint that car?
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KARL
I'm attached to that car. My daughter
was conceived in the back of it.
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KEN
You know, Missy Martin's daughter was
too. Way back when.
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KARL
Not in the back of my car.
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KEN
No, no. But in the back of one very like it.
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KARL
I've heard about that. A car painter?
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KEN
I think he was just a high school boy.
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KARL
I wasn't asking about Missy and her lost
virginity--
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KEN
I don't think she ever found it.
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KARL
--I was asking about my car.
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KEN
KARL
KEN
Buddy could paint your car. I never did
find out who got Missy that way.
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KARL
KEN
Buddy as in Buddy's Septic Sucker.
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KARL
Could paint my car with what?
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KEN
No, no. Cleaning septic systems is his
vocation. Painting cars is a sideline.
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KARL
KEN
Heck, yes. He's my brother-in-law.
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EXT. BUDDY'S - DAY
House, barn, corral, garage. Wooden sign: Let Buddy Suck Your Septic
-- It'll Lighten Your Load.
Screenplay truncated at 500 lines.
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